Thursday, December 6, 2007

The Whole New World....

Not a good day. I don't know how to start my day today. So I log in the internet and start merayap ke blog-blog my friends.

I was still considering nak pergi ke tidak ke Macau ni. Actually, kali ni second offer. I declined the job earlier atas 2 sebab, I baru berenti kerja (June2007) sbb nak rehat dulu and second nak help out a friend with his fan club. Oh ya! My dad sort of x bagi ray pergi jauh2. Kalau pergi I have to stay there for like 3 years.

Today, I realised....I have to start thinking about myself. For the past 5 months, I put others first and myself second. I have been struggling with lots of things lately. When problems occured, I can't find anyone who can listen. Nobody listens nowdays.

Then ray realised lagi, bukan saja 5 bulan lepas...all my life sebenarnya ray asyik fikirkan hal orang lain lebih dari diri sendiri. What can I do? I love to help others as it will give me the satisfaction. Without asking anything in return.

My sister and her family, ada financial problem five years ago. So I helped her out. I bagi modal and bukakkan her tadika for her to manage with all my savings. First three years, we struggled. Terjebak ngn ray plak menanggung hutang. Business was ok tapi not good enough to support one family. My brother in law lost his job so the entire family bergantung pada satu business yang kecil ini. Balik je drpd flight, ray terus ke Seremban kerja. Berkat usaha, we did well... the forth year ..alhamdulillah. Now...we are doing extremely well. The fifth year, we open another tadika.

Last June I have decided to resigned as a flight crew. I am restless. I only sleeps like 2 hours daily. As a crew, we need ample rest. Imagine, tak tido sepanjang malam pastu kena off to London (12 hours flight). Sampai we go again....xleh tido. The next day another 12 hours flight balik pulak. Dalam setahun jugak ray struggle with this problem. Xtahan so I resigned. So, nak rest la kononnya...hahahha.

Sementara bercuti ni...I want to do something. So, ray involve la dengan FC. Great experienced. Berpeluang untuk mengenali interesting individuals who are willing to do anything. Their commitment impressed me so that sorts of helps me to go on. Padehal kerja sukarela tapi sanggup mengorbankan masa mereka kerana FC. If I ni kaya and have a big company....I akan amik dorang ni kerja ngn ray. If they can give good commitment bila bekerja secara sukarela, bayangkan jika mereka ni dibayar gaji...They are so hard working people! They can stay sampai 4 pagi berbincang psal FC. Dorang ni muda lagi... I trust they will become successful individuals in the future.

Now I look at myself. Tempoh percutian dah tamat. I have to do something tahun depan. Tapi apa? Few projects la I have in mind. Tadika dah sis dah boley handle. Family business kat melbourne, zack dah leh handle.

Today, I have decided to resigned as President of a fan club yang selama ini I put my heart and soul into. Hanya Allah saja yang tahu betapa sayangnya ray pada fan club ini. All the hard work dari permulaan, interesting individuals yang ray kenal in the process, artis baru yang sangat ray sayangi...Imagine to let go all that. Sangat berat tapi I have to do it.

Nest year, The Whole New World for me...the new beginning.

3 mulut cakap2 belakang:

Adam said...

go the thing dat u desired most.. sometimes it's good to think and care about others coz' we did it all the time, but sometime ourself is most important!

happiness and sadness will come together as long as we know what should we do..!

i experienced it too.. i've made my decisions, and hope u also do..

Anonymous said...

gud luck ray..!!
wish u all the best..
its good to think psl orang lain..tapi jgn smpai abaikan diri sendiri..kdg2 kte kena ada sikap selfish skit..coz sume orang nk yang terbaik utk diri msing2..(",)


ray eusouff said...

thanks Adam & Yaty....
appreciate sgt.